the OT.

i admit.  when i first became a christian, i used to hate the Old Testament.  long genealogies, repetitive kings, overly extravagant psalms, and confusing prophecies.

now, i begin to see that it is alive with truth, love, and justice.

providentially, i had my bible this morning open to deuteronomy (i spelled that incorrectly when i first typed it, hahaha) after listening to mark driscoll speak from it last night.  originally, i was planning to move away from deuteronomy and read psalms or one of the epistles or something.

but, deuteronomy kept calling to me.

now i know why.

deuteronomy 6:20-25

i admit, one of the hardest struggles for me as a young christian is understanding the concept of obedience because i love God.  i understand grace, unmerited favor.  i understand works and how they are not to be used to try and earn God's favor.   If God loves me, then no matter what i do i can run back to him, right? but obedience, because i love God?  eh.

it could be that the relationship i had with my dad has made it difficult for me to understand this.  i can't really recollect any times, except in recent memories, that he commanded me to do something.

but as i read this passage, and reread it again, i think i get it.  kinda.  the israelites were led out of egypt by the sovereign grace and love of God displayed through his miracles.  he used a man, Moses, to show this.  After all this, God commanded (v.24) the Israelites to keep the decrees and to fear God so that they would prosper and be kept alive, as is the case today.  Obedience to this law, passed down through Moses, would bring about righteousness.  and macathur, in his bible, says to look at verse 5 which is the basis for all of this.  "you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might."

This passage tells me 2 things.

1.  God's commands are for our benefit.  To keep his commands is to tell sin (Bob, hahahah) and death, "go sc*** yourselves" and enjoy the prosperity that comes from being in God's perfect love and holiness.

2.  I can't do this alone.  Just as the Israelites had to look back on the miracles God performed in Egypt (and they were just signs of God, not God himself), I must look back on the cross, place every part of my sinful nature (Bob) there, and ask that God would form a heart of obedience before his cross.

have a good day!

PS - the reference to Bob is a reference to Pastor Arnold's sermon this past sunday in which he personified the sinful nature in Romans 6 & 7 to better illustrate that we are not of sin.  =P

the universe.

paul m kim likes to call me a sentimental freak... hahahah.  but i have to admit, i kind of am.  well, not really sentimental.  just always inspired by God.

here's one example.

this weekend, we had retreat up in running springs (on the way to big bear).  the cabin that we were staying at had an outdoor patio/deck and so at night, you could look out over the city below us and the stars above.  at first, i was talking about the constellations and all that fun astronomy stuff with some of my church friends.  then one of my sisters reminded me the number of stars and galaxies there are in the universe.  i began to stare out.  as i stared at the stars and the universe, i could feel a sense of awe and dread coming over me.

why?

i felt freaking insignificant.  how in the world could i possibly mean anything in this universe?  you can't put a number on the stars or the galaxies or anything.  and yet... it was all created by God.  God fills the entire universe because He created it.  God is outside the universe because He exists with/without creation.

amazing.

you know what's even better?  He loves me.  He loves you.  He really does.  The universe is just a small display of how much He loves.

Psalm 8:3-4

3 When I consider your heavens, 
       the work of your fingers, 
       the moon and the stars, 
       which you have set in place,

 4 what is man that you are mindful of him, 

       the son of man that you care for him?

all the way my savior leads me.

i think this is quickly becoming one of my favorite hymns...

vs.1
All the way my Savior leads me;
What have I to ask beside?
Can I doubt His tender mercy,
Who through life has been my Guide?
Heav’nly peace, divinest comfort,
Here by faith in Him to dwell!
For I know, whate’er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well;
For I know, whate’er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well.
vs.2
All the way my Savior leads me,
Cheers each winding path I tread;
Gives me grace for every trial,
Feeds me with the living Bread.
Though my weary steps may falter,
And my soul athirst may be,
Gushing from the Rock before me,
Lo! A spring of joy I see;
Gushing from the Rock before me,
Lo! A spring of joy I see.
vs.3
All the way my Savior leads me
O the fullness of His love!
Perfect rest to me is promised
In my Father’s house above.
When my spirit, clothed immortal,
Wings its flight to realms of day
This my song through endless ages—
Jesus led me all the way;
This my song through endless ages—
Jesus led me all the way.

reflecting on journal entries.

it's my last night in korea.  my dad's sleeping while i'm waiting for my laundry to dry so i can pack (korean dryers are freaking slow...).  so i pulled out my journal and i started looking back through all the entries i've written starting in ghana.  i should do this way more often since it shows me two things.  

1.  my writing skills have not changed much since i've entered college (writ 140 B-, writ 340 B+)  

2.  i tend to leave many things unanswered in what i write because i assume that i'll understand them when i look back to read.

both need to change.  which means i need to practice more in writing.  ahaha.

anyway, i want to share an entry because i think that as i reflected on this entry it was a good reminder for me.

_________________________

7-30-08, 7:26 AM

Morning QT - Daniel 7-9

Daniel 9:19 - We do not make requests of you because we are righteous but because of your great mercy.

Finding joy in God requires that we see the immense amount of mercy that has been shown to us.  God has been merciful not only in the death of Christ as the atonement for my sin, but also in this life that I continually live, at times in rebellion to him.

I want to taste the sweetness of joy that I have because of God's mercy.  Knowing this, I can not take any moment for granted.  I must realize the extent of joy that I have in Christ Jesus's death and what it means to my life now.

To live within God's mercy means to bring prayer to God knowing that is not me who can make any sort of impact on God's decision to be merciful.  Instead, I must live within that mercy but know that God does good for whom he loves, and in that I can have joy.

God, please be merciful to me.

Thinking about these past couple of days and considering where I've placed most of my thinking has led me to see that my humility is so feeble in comparison to Christ.  How could be so foolish into thinking that I could be as humble as Christ?  It is not by my power or spirit that I am able to be humble.

_________________________

i write about humility a lot because it's often on my mind.  but i do not practice it nearly as much as i think about it.  

this is kind of ironic.  i've been watching a lot of impressionist comedians recently.  the difference between a good and great impressionist (frank caliendo is great.  youtube him) is how much their verbal and non verbal communication are identical to the person they are imitating.  those that are good can usually get the verbal part right but their non verbals (body posture, facial expressions) aren't as good.  those that are great do everything well because they essentially become that person, even in their state of mind.

philippians 2:5 says that my attitude should be the same as Christ Jesus.  attitude is what actually makes an action humble.  it's not just giving the "right response."  it's honestly believing that i truly don't deserve anything i have, but because of God's great mercy, i can have life and so much more.  knowing that, i can make philippians 2:2-3 (do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves) an actuality in my life.

this is why i should do this more often.  hahaha.  ok.  back to packing.

observation.

DISCLAIMER: This post does not point towards the general state of mind of the author in what he desires.  It is simply an observation of his everyday surroundings in the motherland.

__________________________________________________

there's a really big trend here in korea.  and, as my astute friend pointed out, it just seems to be a holiday fad.

what is it?

being with someone.  guy/girl.  not really even boyfriend/girlfriend.

i mean, it was the holiday season... still kinda is.  as my good friend steve pointed out...

"korean dramas + winter season = makes you wanna gf/bf"

ahahaha.  good math.