a compliment as an insult?

note: the following situation did not actually happen, it's just an example.

this is something that i've been thinking about lately. you know when someone compliments someone at the expense of another? like let's say, i'm playing basketball with some church friends. and, one who shall not be named (frank la), tears me up at it, because:
a) he's much quicker than me.
b) he actually knows how the game of basketball is played.
c) he has mad skills.

now. after the game, i hear another church person, let's say steve kwon, compliments frank saying, "man frank, you tore it up that game." now obviously, this comment is not directed toward anyone except frank la. but, in a sense, it does come at the expense of another person, i.e. me and my team. we lost the game, honorably, but still lost. and it was because of frank's mad skill and my lack of skill that factored into the loss.

now, let's consider something else that i hear in churches more often. like, "man, pastor ********** is such a good speaker." and knowing that other pastors hears these things, i wonder how that makes the other pastors think about their own ministry. does it make them feel less adequate in preaching? does it make them reconsider their vocation? does it, God forbid, actually make them want to quit what they do? (note: i'm pretty sure most pastors have faced enough criticism to have some sort of immunity to this, but this is just another example of what i'm talking about) (this may also be questioned as some to be "insecurity." i'd like to say that it's more of a reaction to opinion)

the reason why i ask this is because there's a lot of glory given to those that are good. and as long as that glory is attributed to God's glory, it is no way bad. however, God also does call us to encourage and to recognize that people are given various gifts under God's grace (see Romans 12, 1 Corinthians 12, 1 Peter 4:10-11). does that make me choose my words more carefully? mmm, possibly. something i'll have to think about even more so.

happy president's day weekend! hope you had a good, rest-filled weekend.