then why in the hell do I keep thinking that God's goodness is what I consider to be good?
Sorry about the exclamatory question (only emphasized by the "hell" in that question). But I've been asking myself this question a ton this summer. My definition of good had been this: Do something productive this summer. Meaning you have to be a part of some program or some initiative or someTHING.
Instead, God decided to keep me from going on missions, from getting an internship, from finding a job. And yea, I am staying in school for one more semester. So at least that helps.
But my definition of God being good was giving me an opportunity to do something productive this summer.
How I've been rebuked and blind in seeing what God has done.
I've realized that the Gospel is never, ever fully known. Because every day, every moment, there needs to be a serious consideration of the cross in my continual sinful flesh. And in these moments, God shows me that there is a continual need to continually focus on the fundamentals of faith.
And doing something productive, in knowing God's goodness, is exactly that. Rely on Him and Him alone for all the good things. Because truly, all the time, God is good.
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